Sitting in his room

Sigh.....this week had been mostly good with some tears but that's to be expected. I'm semi-laying and semi-sitting in Brett's bed, next to the walrus he made in his theater(?) class at Auburn. I was under the false illusion that his family were getting better but really, it's just bubbling right below the surface. I'm not sure what I can say or do to make things easier or better for them. I lost a boyfriend but they lost their son. My loss seems so insignificant to them. When I got there, Kathy thought for a second that Brett would be right next to me. I'm not sure if I'm just causing more pain or hurting. I don't know.